Sometimes you need to know how to have hard conversations to address an issue or a problem. It might be a behavior towards you by some person that you might be get hurt or neglected or discriminated. You want to tell that person about what actually is bothering you about that matter. You want to relieve your frustration by wanting a one on one discussion to come to a positive outcome.
1-Prepare yourself
First of all you need to admit that you need to have hard conversations with some person. Then you should be mentally prepared about what exactly you need to say. This makes you clear about what issue to be addressed and what kind of outcome it might generate for you. So be very straight forward.
2-Listen to them
Everyone thinks that I am perfect and the blame game is for other person. Here you need to listen to others by knowing what they feel about the situation. There might be some misunderstanding due to lack of communication or they haven’t felt that way. Or you want some favor that they are providing to others and you feel neglected and you deserve that.
3-Discuss exactly what you want
If you really want the result what you desire that makes you to have hard conversations is by discussing to the right person the right thing. This will lead you to a desired result without losing the relationship. If you discuss that matter with someone other than that, as a mediator you might not get the desired result with more frustration but sometime it also works.
4-Don’t escape situation
Sometimes we might think that everything will fix itself with time than you might be wrong. You need to address what is bothering you. Escaping or avoiding a hard conversation is not a solution sometimes you need to be direct to the person about what your concern is. You will definitely get what you wanted.
5-Be respectful
Everyone needs respect be it white or black, short or tall or what other features might be they deserve respect. And if you want to earn respect than you need to give respect, especially when there is a matter where you have lost your temper to that person. Still if you need to win the situation or get what you want you need not to cross the boundaries by controlling yourself to remain quiet when your anger rages. Be patient and address the problem and move on.
6-Be careful about tone
Many people start misbehaving with others when they have some issue. They use bad language. To avoid this you need to practice to control your tone in which you speak that might feel good to both of you and to come on to a common ground. Don’t use sarcastic words that may heat a conversation. Your tone in which you speak that time matters.
7-See their perspective
This is what someone might be in some situation that you don’t know and doesn’t intent to does anything wrong to you. So don’t be personal. You need to have hard conversation because they might don’t even know you feel that way. In this way talking is the only way to have a win-win situation without hurting anyone of you.
8-Preserve relationship
There are some family relations as well as you have relatives the other relations could be your friends, colleagues or boss or any other person. What you see if you need to have hard conversations with anyone of them does the relationship will preserve or not that is your decision. You can’t leave your family but you need to think about your other relations they need to be sustained with mutual understanding.
9-Deal with emotions positively
If you think that someone has hurt you then you might also have hurt that person. In this way you need to discuss and deal with each other’s emotions positively. Care for each other’s feelings by choosing good words not hurtful ones. Don’t play with each other’s feelings you don’t know about from what they are going through.
10-Have an ideal place for discussion
If you need a desired outcome that leads to have hard conversations then you should keep in mind what could be the ideal place to talk about. Sometimes there could be many people sitting around which you should avoid to talk at that time. See from your own perspective which could be the right place to address the issue.
11-Resolve conflict
Having conflicts is a human nature you need to resolve every now or then. For this you need to develop skills to resolve conflicts and lead a situation which makes you grow and learn that you need to address the problem to have solution and move to other things in life. And vent out your frustration in an appropriate manner.
12-Agree towards resolution
When on the way to have hard conversations you should come to a position where both of you come to a resolution that benefits both of you. Because no one wants loss or regret, be humble enough to care for the other person so that both of you agree towards resolving the problem and move on to other things in life and be free of mind.
13-Expect good outcome
What you think you become beware of thoughts coming your way as it will make you act that way. So always expect for good for oneself as well as for others. By focusing over that you will be able to choose good words rather than bad and ugly words and then you will see good coming to you.
Conclusion
There are chances you might get the feeling to have hard conversations with someone. You should definitely go for that. Communicating your concern to the right person at that right place is essential to both of you to sustain a relationship and beware of each other’s feelings. By addressing this you will notice betterment in how you feel about that person or situation that you want to be resolved as soon as possible.